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Tuesday, January 30, 2007
- i'm lovin' it... @ 10:30 AM =) though fadzli complains he cant view the full video. i'll adjust the video size for you, ok darling? but i still won't change the skin. maybe i can start thinking about changing our blogskin. heh. lurpe you many many. <3 you know you love me, Monday, January 29, 2007
- a tribute.. a white lie... @ 9:58 PM he called to ask me what i was doing up so late (at 2 plus in the morning) when i should be sleeping. i told him that i was playing some game. he caught me for a moment when he asked what game i was playing. a few seconds of silence before i actually managed to answer him, "eh.. crossword puzzle..". phew. when the fact was, i was doing something for him. i kept it a secret. not wanting to let him know. i was excited. but at the same time, scared. you see, fadzli is not someone who likes surprises. all the time, when i plan a surprise for him, i will end up telling him what the surprise is. in the end. it won't be a surprise at all. pffft. but this, it was a real surprise. almost all of our friends have seen it. and of course they said it was sweet. and they also asked what is the special occasion. there's no special occasion. our monthsary is like more or less 20 days away. and we dont celebrate valentine's day. i just felt like doing it. let's just say, its a because-i-love-you-so-i-thought-of-wanting-to-give-you-a-nice-surprise occasion. not bad for my first time in a picture montage. =) (press esc to "silent" my background song before playing the video. there' music in the montage. thank you.) btw, there's another nice surprise some time soon for you fadzli. i know you dont like surprises. but i totally love surprises. =) you know you love me, Saturday, January 27, 2007
- lessons learnt.. @ 12:14 PM many a time when fadzli and myself argue, i tend to run away from it all. i will be the one saying its over, that things wont work out between us. i nvr wanted to stay on to work things out. i guess i just wanted to take the easy way out. and many a time, during arguments, we will say things that we know will hurt each other. on purpose. and all the time, we will be ok aft the arguments. bcoz i guess, we are not ready to let each other go just as yet. i dun think we ever will. as much as i always say that i wan him to leave, i noe myself well enuf to know that is not what i want. and then, i read something from a fellow blogger's blog who happens to be the aunty of my fren. let's call her aunt nora. =) ** 5 Ways To Refresh Your Relationship ** A relationship is like a delicate rose bush. If you care for it, it will bloom year after year with unsurpassed beauty. If you don't, you might end up with a dull, lifeless entity that is struggling to survive. Below are five ideas to keep your relationship in bloom for years to come.If you are single, read these tips with an eye on what you will want to do in a long-term relationship. If you are in a relationship, pick one or two of the five ideas and integrate them into your relationship now. You will be amazed at how many nice feelings you can create quickly by taking a few simple steps. 1. Make time for your relationship week after week. Take time for each other every single week. For most couples, it is a good idea to have a standing date night. Communicate to your friends, kids, everyone, that this night is reserved especially for the two of you. Keep the date every week, no matter what. Make it your priority. 2. Do fun, pleasurable things together. Sharing fun and pleasure fosters intimacy. Intimacy is what relationships are all about. Share good meals, share play time, share jokes and funny movies, share outdoor activities. What matters most is that the activity is fun and pleasurable for each of you. 3. Do long-term activities as a couple. Do something long-term together. Learn about investments, take dance lessons, refinish the furniture, reach your fitness goals. Do some long-term activity that will enrich and interest each of you, together. By doing this you will stay connected to each other and foster common ground in the relationship. Make sure that this is above and beyond child rearing. 4. Resolve conflict quickly. It is hard to say you are sorry in the heat of an argument. In some ways it is easier to have a fight and go into your separate corners. But unresolved conflict, or conflict that lingers, fosters long-term hurt and resentment. It's ok to disagree. But it's important to find a resolution quickly. 5. Keep the romance alive. In a long-term relationship, romance is not something that happens automatically most of the time. Everyday pressures and time constraints have a tendency to rob us of spontaneity. Romance needs to be consciously created. Remember that romance will keep your relationship fresh and exciting and will keep the two of you close. Take turns creating romance intentionally. Your Relationship Coach, Rinatta Paries  you know you love me, Thursday, January 25, 2007
- mundane.. mundane.. @ 11:28 PM that was what happened this morning. ended up going to work later because i just couldnt sit up. i've gotta do up 4pm's website. its been a very long long time since i've done websites. so far, i've been doing blogs. so i don't really know i am still capable of doing a website. worth a try though. i am done doing the publicity materials for the the department with regards to the recruitment of mentors for year 2007. only left with the poster. so far, been getting positive comments on the designs. so yay! caught babel with kakak last wednesday. or was it thursday? cant remember. you have to like really concentrate on the movie because the storyline is not really in chronological order. kinda slow. not really my kind of show. but it was free tickets to its preview screening. so might as well. btw, i get free tickets to preview quite often. be nice to me and i might bring you one day. heh. but of course only after fadzli cant make it then i will start asking other people la. went to catch the illusionist at vivo city on tuesday with fadzli, jo, brock and yan. free tickets from ncss. come with the popcorn combo some more. cool movie. unexpected ending. really worth your buckaroos if you ask me. go catch it, ok. went to watch that singapore-malaysia match with fadzli after the movie. like omg. i was bored. so distracted. counted the number of buses that pass us by. scrutinising the pictures of the food on the menu. realise that the seafood in the pictures are not cooked, they just pour the different gravy on them. maybe ways of saving cost. whatever. i think the score was a draw or something. i dunno. then got like this guy with bandage around his head and yet he continues playing. like cool. i've got a job interview somewhere, another malay organisation to be exact. its on wednesday. contemplating whether i should go. i need a change of environment. and to be resigning from my current work so as to work in another malay organisation is not really a change of environment, is it? plus, frankly speaking, i am really, really, really attached to my current job. jonny's gf's having her birthday party at east coast this sat. this sat is also fadzli's off. i doubt i will be able to go for the party. she may be jonny's gf, but that dun make her my friend, right? i am meeting belinda next sunday. we had to like cancel our date this month because her grams just passed away. not sure where we'll be going. but will be watching that happy birthday movie. the one with louis khoo. cant wait. =) random entry i'd have to admit. but will do, ya? "love is when u see ur other half cries & u'll do anything to make him/her smile again." - to fadzli: i Y you many many. =) you know you love me, Saturday, January 20, 2007
- for the fun & glory... =) @ 7:42 AM  Create your own Friend Quiz here you know you love me, Friday, January 19, 2007
- i still love him, hokay... @ 11:09 AM but i am not going to delete that entry. because i m not who does. fadzli read the entry already. he told me so on the phone just now. and the background song, it has nth to do with the situation. i just like the song. so please do not make up some stories that i dedicate the background song to fadzli. and fadzli and myself are cool now. he apologised. and i forgive him. i still love him alot alot. but i guess i m still sore abt what he did. i m definitely not someone who can easily cool down when i get angry. nope. i told him that, i think. but we are cool now. i dont ignore his calls or msges anymore. in fact, i'll be meeting him later with the kids. i still love him. i wasnt mad at him because he went clubbing. he told me just now that i didnt react the way i reacted when he went clubbing before this. all i said to him after that was, "but yesterday was the 18th..." and he understood. thank you. btw, happy new year to all muslims. its the first muharram today, yes? you know you love me, Thursday, January 18, 2007
- pffft... @ 2:55 PM and fadzli will be clubbing at mos. cool kan. and tonight at mos is some tertiary fling thing. maybe he will find some smart-ass chick who is smarter than me. who is a pretty whore. a fucking thin bitch. then he will dump me for her. what's new. its a norm. guys dump girls. damn it. i m pissed. no. i m not controlling his fucking life. he is a bloody 27yo who will be turning fucking 28yo this year. he knows how to take care of his damn life. and he should know better about what he does that will make me fucking pissed off. he should fucking know by now la. i wont care anymore if he's gonna get pissed drunk and end up fucking all the clubbers who is with pussies. i dont fucking care anymore. because if he does that, then i'll leave. maybe that is what he has been wanting me to do. to leave. so he won't be this damn "bad guy" who does the dumping but rather he's the one who got "dumped". i m tired pretending like i dont mind and shit when the thing is i do. i bloody mind that he clubs. i fucking care if he drinks. and all this while, i've been acting like i m ok. I AM NOT FUCKING OK!!!! i m tired. i m bloody tired. its our fucking 3rd month and he is bloody enjoying himself at a club full of girls. damn it. and i have no right to be jealous at all? bullshit. damn it. dont get me wrong. i love him much. too much i supposed. i cant believe i m actually crying typing this entry. i just wished he didnt go. i was so looking forward to meeting him today. its his off day. i guess i m just too used to meeting him on his off days. and not being able to meet him today, i guess i felt cheated. damn it. mr. mohd fadzli b jamaludin, i hope you know i fucking love u truckloads. i just wish you'll understand... you know you love me, Tuesday, January 16, 2007
- have faith... @ 10:43 PM but obviously, i cant keep anything from fadzli. pffft. so ended up telling him and he in turn shouted at me. not his fault for shouting at me because i deserve it la. stupid me. i was so worried, i couldnt think straight. i was hoping to find it back. i was hoping someone was playing a prank. but obviously, no la. who would in the first place? its not something minor. but i had faith that i will find it that it took me a week to look for it, be it in the office and at home. and all the while, people didnt know. but of course i couldnt find it. though i was really, really, really hoping that i will find it. and only a week after the incident, then i decided to tell fadzli. i guess if i m in his shoes, i would have reacted the same way too. i was so confused. so lost. i didnt know what to do. hell, i still dont know what to do come to think of it. and at this point of time, i just wish that this is a stupid nightmare and i will wake up one day. you know you love me, Monday, January 15, 2007
- finally... @ 11:39 PM went courts too. fadzli's sucha sore loser la. haha. i like playing xbox with fadzli becaue he made me feel like i m good in it. haha. i beat his arse off in the car racing game and boxing. lol. and when he insist that its unfair. he said i won because i am a girl. like wat je seh. hahaha. ni la tak nak mengaku kalah punya anak. but he beat me in tennis. but what is like beating me in one game compared to me beating him in two games. =) had lunch at mad jack's. the one at jalan kayu. took pics but have yet to upload. will do soon. lazy la. spent some quality time together at our normal spot. kewlies. had our late late dinner at serangoon, just before he sent me home. i love him loads. or have i told u that already? =) you know you love me, Saturday, January 13, 2007
- many many photos... @ 12:08 AM fadzli and myself met for 7 days (equivalent to a week) straight. so what did we do? alot of things. we didnt take pictures everyday of course.     and we have alot alot couple-couple thing without even realising.       i m very much so crazy over him. i hope he is too. =) you know you love me, Wednesday, January 10, 2007
- cannot tahan... @ 10:45 AM so here i am, stuck with a couple of people who are pure suck-ups la. and i definitely cannot tahan. i cannot even tahan those who want to suck up to me. please lor. i m definitely not that stupid sampai can't see people who are trying so hard to suck up to others. more reason to why i should leave. cannot tahan, cannot tahan. you know you love me, Tuesday, January 09, 2007
- tired la... @ 11:42 AM so i promised him that i will update when i got home. kinda. not exactly what he would have expected me to update about. ouh well. went out with fadzli. thursday. friday(lunch). saturday. sunday. monday. tuesday. and if we meet tomorrow, it'll be a full week. so many things to be updated. so little time. actually, more of lack of mood to blog nowadays. maybe next entry will be a super freakingly long one. you know you love me, Saturday, January 06, 2007
- something random? maybe. @ 11:53 PM trust me. it's not done on purpose. i can't seem to concentrate at work anymore too. and i doubt moving back in will make much of a difference. i love my job, i guess. i mean, i love what i am doing but i am unsure now whether i really do love my job. at times i feel like i wanna perservere and at times i just wanna give up. i love the people i am working with. well, the truth is, only some of them. i love planning things, planning sabotage for birthday boys/girls with them. i love going shopping with them. i love just hanging out with them. but i don't really understand what is wrong with me. i used to love going to work. i used to look forward to going to work. but as time goes by slowly, i start to dread it. i used to stay back doing whatever things i needed to do but noe, i will try my very best to be out of the office at 6.15pm the latest. i used to check my work email every single day (even on weekdays & my off days), but now i couldn't be bothered to check it, maybe just once in a while. it's like, i can't be bothered anymore. i couldn't care less. damn it. what is wrong with me? =( you know you love me, Friday, January 05, 2007
- pondering... @ 11:25 PM i mean i love kids and all. but i've never thought of the idea of being in the same room with the whole lot of them. maybe, just maybe, i should consider. anyways, the contract of another year has yet to be signed. you know you love me, Wednesday, January 03, 2007
- good times spent.. =) @ 1:47 PM started out with me having to take a cab down to pasir ris because i was late. =) took the bike down to city plaza to get something and having breakfast cum lunch at banquet. took this love test thing over in city plaza. fadzli cheated. bluek.   his first test which is "dead fish". heh.  his second test after he cheated. "hot stuff". bluek.  my result, which is the same for both tests. "wicked". =p back to pasir ris where we blade under his void deck. had a fall and my knee's badly bruised. =( (pssst.. he bought a pair of rollerblades yesterday just so he could blade with me. sweet kan...)  our rollerblades. a size 13 and a size 6. heh. then, took the bike to our regular hangout place and spent more time together. till like 8plus, i think. had our shephard's pie and chicken lasagne and jumbo chicken wings from canadian pizza. =) then off to my void deck with a cup of coke light big gulp. discuss about some matters (read: serious) and it really got me thinking about certain things. had a (kinda) heart to heart talk. between fadzli and me. it's back to work tomorrow. so not looking forward to it. so pfft... you know you love me, Tuesday, January 02, 2007
- everything changes... @ 2:16 AM i've moved. i mean, now this is my current blog. the previous one, well, i've been using it since september 2004. more than 2 years ago. and when i read the old posts in that blog, a mixture of feelings developed inside me. that was why i decided to change to a new url. i m never really a person of resolutions during the new year so this year, it'll be a lil bit different. i would really like to be closer to god this year. of my 22 years living, i don't think i've really did my part as a muslim. well, the first step is to wear a tudung, which i already did in december 2006. there are many more things for me to do but i m doing it very slowly. i also wanna be a better daughter and sister. though none of them really complained, but i feel i can do better. maybe i should work on my short-temper first before anything else. ouh. and i m supposed not to spoil my nephew, niece and my lil sister this year onwards. order from my brother, my sister-in-law and my mother. =( a better friend to my friends. definitely. but not all though. only those whom i think are my friends. and i need to stop pretending to be oblivious of the backstabbing going around. not that i will join in te backstabbing, maybe i should just stop being nice to them. it's real tired acting to be nice to people whom u know dun deserve it, just because u dun wanna hurt their feelings. watever. and in the end, it's me getting hurt. pffft.. be a better gf to fadzli. stop picking fights with him. =) watever happened in 2006, may it just be part of the memories. we can't totally erase watever shit that happens but we can definitely learn from it. right? i am supposed to go over to pasir ris aft fadzli's night shift tmr. wait, make it later. and i am supposed to meet him at 10am. we are going rollerblading. =) time check now is 2.30am and i've yet to sleep. and fadzli's waking me up at 7.30am later. damn. think i betta go off to sleep now. toodles. you know you love me, |
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